Emily Howard is a totally unconvincing transvestite who runs a guest house in the seaside town of Old Haven. Emily welcomes all his guests warmly, but remember to treat Emily like a lady or he will get very upset. You can find Emily doing all manner of ladylike things, but some say the 'lady' doth protest too much!

In series two Emily is joined by another lady friend... with a tash.

Committed 'homosexualist' Daffyd lives in the Welsh town of Llanddewi Brefi. Proud to be gay, Daffyd flaunts his sexuality in variety of rubber outfits, to the villagers' complete indifference. He refuses to accept he's not the only 'gayer' in the village, and is outraged when fellow gays trespass on his patch.

Lou is a 'helper' and spends his days helping his wheelchair-bound friend, Andy, who’s grumpy and monosyllabic. Andy, however, is not all that he seems. When he wants to, he is quite able to walk, climb and even dive - something to which Lou is oblivious as he devotes his life to catering to Andy's whims.

Marjorie Dawes is the rotund leader of Fat Fighters. Viciously disparaging towards the terrified dieters, she gives handy hints like, "Dust is low in fat so you can eat as much dust as you like" and motivational exhortations like "Picture yourself naked - not nice is it, eh? Who the hell would want a great lump?" Anybody? No? Dust!

In the town of Darkly Noone resides young Vicky Pollard, an incomprehensible pink Kappa clad teenager and the nemesis of many a teacher and social worker. Often heard rambling about "this fing wot you know nuffin about", she stubs out her fags, orders snakebite and totally denies any responsibility for anything, ever.

Queen of the Chavs her catch-phrase is "Yeah, but no, but yeah but no".

Sebastian Love is the the effete personal secretary to Prime Minister Michael. Camper than a pink row of tents and more jealous than a two year old Sebastian has a huge crush on his boss. The secretary certainly doesn't keep his lust hidden - he's strutted around Number Ten nude and even tried to cop off with the PM at a party.